mystic_savage

...at this moment, mostly Karen. James has been gone for a couple of days now--he got called out to the east coast friday for an urgent computer troubleshooting thing that he does, but he got snowed down and has been in airports and on planes ever since. Karen's been carrying solstice forward, completely without any self-pity, utterly with strength and grace and happiness and making the world happy for everyone in the house. Also, she went to the hardware store yesterday and fixed the downstairs toilet and the upstairs sink. Karen is made of awesome. Naomi (10) has been here this weekend, and Sam & Tera of course...and they're all individually a joy. Tera charms me into reading to her; Sam had a fit today but let me know that he's angry with his mom, not with me -- I was so impressed that he was able to verbalize that. He's six and historically not very verbal. Naomi's been running around helping Karen clean and put up tables and keeping the littles entertained. Jonice (a 13 year old neighbor and honorary housemate) has also been around and pitching in, even though Natalie (12) has been away. Jonice and her cousin made our household a foot tall clay dragon sculpture for the dining room table and it looks awesome!

Yup, I'm pretty blessed. And that's before you even get to my wonderful little urchins.

We've decided what we're doing for Solstice-mas at Dragon House. This is the first year that our families will be celebrating together, and we're doing the holiday on the 20th & 21st. We'll bring the tree in on the 20th -- it's outdoor year round and can stand being inside maybe up to 40 hours or so, but not much more. Then those who are going to the panto will go (it's Aladdin this year) and some of us (ok -- me & mine) will stay home for quiet domestic time. I'll make dinner. We decorate the tree after dinner and then take off for the Chinese Garden across the street, all bundled up and carrying candles, for a solstice ceremony. I've got a short solstice story I usually read, and then we'll sing the solstice song I put together today, hopefully in rounds if the kids can carry it off, while lighting our candles. And we'll walk back. There you have it, short and sweet, darkness to light.

Back at the house: hot chocolate and if I get it together, sun shaped giant lemon sugar cookies. Or opadit 's amazing butter tarts, which are her grandmother's recipe and which she used to serve at her winter solstice party. The 20th is the night that Santa will come at our house too (changes from year to year depending on when K & J get the two older girls and when I get my two kids). In the morning we do stockings, and all the kids get basically the same things in their stocking: nuts, two oranges, one maple candy, one dilettante chocolate Santa, and a gift which may or may not actually fit into the stocking. K & J have worked on keeping it simple over the years. At that time, if the kids have any presents for each other or from anyone else they exchange them. And that's pretty much it. Then K & J will take all the kids ice skating, I'll go to work for the afternoon, and that evening is the big lasagna feast. So that's Solstice-mas. The sun song (included herein for SpaceDaddy) is to the tune of "Rose, Rose, Rose, Red/Will I ever see thee wed" and goes like this:

Sun, sun, sun, sun/from the darkness comes the sun/new sun rising, ever shining/Welcome the sun.

Christmas Day itself? Nothing special here. The kids will probably do *something* with their dad, and I might hold over a present or two from their grandparents. But that's pretty much it.

Today was a day for spontaneous good dialogue at my house.  For example:

Me:  I'm taking a mental health day tomorrow.
Karen:  Oh.  I hope it works.

Or--

James:  (yells a warning to Buster Keaton as he's watching a DVD)
Me:  You know, he can't hear you.
James:  I know.  Because it's a silent movie.

And, while Karen was showing Natalie (12) her baby pictures as James and I are waiting to start Buffy, she shows Natalie a picture of the first time she ever had chocolate cake.

Me:  A loss of innocence.
James:  They should do that for vampires.  Take a picture of their first taste of human blood.
Me:  (pinching invisible cheeks) oh, isn't he cute?  isn't he a cute vampire?
James:  I'll bet he'd be mortified.

Living with people.  It can be entertaining.

We introduced Natalie to Buffy tonight.  Season 1.  First three episodes.  Since Natalie is extremely fashion conscious, it made me aware of how long ago season 1 was filmed.  Eg:  In the Harvest, Buffy is walking around in the sewers and a rat runs in front of her foot.

Natalie:  Ew!
Me:  The square-toed boots?
Natalie:  Yes!  (beat) Well, and the rat.

Before I enter the house when I come home, I take a deep breath and prepare myself to accept whatever is on the other side of the door, to meet whoever is in the house however they are at that moment.  Since I'm often walking into a situation with four kids and lots of chaos, just taking that little mental step allows me to walk in and be available, rather than to walk in with an agenda and try to start controlling things.  It's a tiny thing, but it makes a difference in my attitude, and while it may not brighten anybody else's life much, it does allow me to be present for just a moment. 

One other thing I do sometimes, on the bus in the morning.  I just look at people and wish good things for them for the day.  Another tiny, tiny thing which may make no quantitative difference in their lives or mine, but which makes a huge qualitative difference in my availability for conversation (and that has led to some very nice bus acquaintance-ships).